Ah, dear karma
Bitter-sweet friend
We’ll feast gladly on your fruit
Until their ripenings end

As long as seeds are nurtured
That bind the mind of man
In jails of cyclic suffering
May our feastings never end
May no fruit to hard to swallow
Drive us to defeat
As we stay with noble courage
To know this feast complete

Countless Buddhas
Raining Bliss
Embracing Wisdom
With a kiss
Touching us all
With healing love
Resounding in A Sanskrit “a”

i am at the portland airport using the free wi-fi on my new lifedrive. its cool but slow. i would feel smug except when i first tried to connect to the internet without setting up wi-fi the device crashed and took 5 minutes to boot.

paul has been gone since the 15th and i am tired of living alone. the price will pay to spend the weekend with him is to spend it in prison (shambhala training)

i have a new pda because i couldnt get my old one back from Paul who is hooked on sukudo

I took a 6 day course on the Bonny Technique of Guided Imagery and Music (GIM). It was offered by the Music Therapy Department of Marylhurst College. One of the instructors is part of my Reiki Lineage. I was interested because I thought it my fit in with playing music at the bedside.

It was really quite a strange experience. I thought the guiding would have involved more suggested imagery. In a GIM Session, there are two people involved, the guide and the imager. The ‘session’ starts with an intake, induction (progressive muscle relaxation as example), a suggested starting point, then carefully designed classical music is played. The imager talks about any sensations, thoughts, or images that come to mind. The guide listens, makes listening noises and gently keeps the session rolling. Finally there is out take.

Helen Bonny designed music programs for the LSD research in the 60’s at the Maryland Psychiatric Research Center . It is in part a non-drug method of exploring consciousness and perhaps invoking a peak religious experience. I found it very irritating. I can go much more deeply in to an altered state with entrainment music and without having to talk to someone at the same time. I also felt frustrated with how long it took and how little we really got into it for the 6 day period. You can take a course from the Foundation for Shamanic Studies and in a weekend get a good toolbox of techniques to interact and relate to your inner landscape.

I haven’t really re-entered normal society since I took the class Thursday – Tuesday. Paul is on a 10 day business trip and I’ve been telecommuting. I did make the arduous 2.5 mile commute in to the office yesterday. It was a ghost town and the only living person I spoke to was the guy next door and at best his hold on reality is shaky.

I’ve been thinking about Utah. I go back about once a year. I’ve got family in Logan & Salt Lake. This year will be my 20 year high school reunion. I’m not attending since I spent a week in Logan for my sister’s wedding. Enough is Enough.

Yesterday I reconnected with a friend from High School, Jason Peterson, who you can see then & now. He said:

 

Wow, what a strange state we hail from. Glad we got out! 

My family moved to Logan Utah in the 5th Grade. I was born in Salt Lake City but we moved to Dekalb Illinois for my father’s teaching job at Northern Illinois University The departure was long enough that I was not ever able to properly re-enter the society. Most of the later years 1986-1991 were devoted to reaching escape velocity.

Without a doubt it is a nutty place.

I believe the locals would like you to think that as a rule it is a righteous, conservative, and wholesome place.  They do seem to believe that society is better there.

Today I polled a few people about what they though it would be like:

white-bread conformance

a high quality of life in the lovely town of Salt Lake City in spring AND desperation… some raggedy-assed hobo trying to thumb his way out of town with no intention of ever returning to such a pit of misery as that entire state is rumored to be

a state that has a high percentage of mormons. red rocks… great for skii, hicking, camping..out doors

What you may not know about Utah is there is a very healthy and active counter culture made possible in part from the don’t ask, don’t tell mentality of the State. Some of my oldest memories of Salt Lake are of my dad taking me to Cosmic Airplane.

This weekend I took on the Blackberry Bush that had taken over the side of my house. The way was impassable and some of the tendrils were as thick as my wrist. It was such a nasty thing. I had double layers of leather gloves on and it still sliced through them. The abandoned construction items on the side make it look even trashier. 

My nine mile run on Saturday was a nightmare. I had a headache and was nauseated for the first hour and a half (then it did get better). Isn’t that a disturbing thought. I don’t trust anything I think or feel anymore. Since Portland Fit moved to NW we had been meeting up after for breakfast at Marsee Bakery. It was bought out by Three Lions Bakery. I was half way through my half of the breakfast sandwitch before I noticed how great it was and I wasn’t at the bakery i thought i was at. None of the decorations had changed but it was sooooo much better.